Mandatory Blog Here

Mom calls to wake me out of my 10 hour slumber I am stuck in the alley My alley? No My alley Ugh Nevermind OK Click I call her back, Ok let me get dressed I throw on a pair of heavy jeans that I cant zip up over my fat gut Throw on a long sweater to cover open zipper Put hubby's hoody on and stumble down my alley to get to her alley On the way I am thinking what the heck, how am I going to get her out? I am out of breath walking over here. She should have put some weight in her trunk AHA Moment Open your trunk says I What Open the trunk I am going to sit in it My massive weight gave her the traction to get it moving Then we rocked it back and forth until she could back back in driveway and go out the other side of her paved parking lot See! Being fat does come in handy

Arent Women suppose to be hardcore nursemaids, caretakers, housekeepers, invincible warriors on the home front? Do they not take pride in their home, cooking, care, motherly ways and womenly loving shkills. If so I have to say when it comes to myself, Epic Fail Todays example: Changed kitty litter, dry heaved and threw up in garbage bag during entire process. Made a ham and cheese omelet, discovered no butter for toast, but had butter flavord crisco left over from baking, tried to pass it off on unsuspecting hubby. Brushed golden retriever long shedding hair on porchs,couldnt find his dog brush, used hubby's instead telling myself I will clean it before he notices. Forgot to take trash bag with me so threw hair clumps in recycle bin. Made homemade bread in bread machine on express bake, middle not done so served from sides instead. Overslept till 1pm, used washcloth on body,parts I could reach, and sprayed body spray on remaining offending parts. Slumping around in sam

I got an email saying I had been selected to win a prize The contest listed was one I had entered It had an attachment of rules prizes etc. I checked the forum of sweepstakes I enter and its all legit Prizes are 1st a 1000$ Best Buy card 2nd a Tivo DVR 3rd 100$ worth of dvds YAY I will take any of those But the stupid thing said expect an email telling you how to claim your prize you have won WTH You did email Why not tell me in that email Now I am stalking my inbox like a nut Do they just like to mess with you? edit to add I just read it again and it does say I won the family prize pack which is dvds 100 $ worth YAY I wonder what they are?

  I am freaking freezing. We decided if we arent working we are just going to stay in bed I have my new warm quilt to keep me cozy and of course these two also like to lay on top of me and keep me warm How are you all handling it.

  We all went to see Avatar last night Lots of rave reviews It reminded me a lot of the film Ferngully Also a lot like the film Dancing with Wolves Plus that blue skin made me think of smurfs It was one hour too long in my opinion But only because I needed a cig and had to pee  Didnt really need a blue smurf shag scene The orange dragon at the end kind of looked like some emo teens skateboard paint job  But and I am sure I am not telling you something you havent heard already The freaking graphics and 3d is like all kinds of awesomeness What are your thoughts? On a funny note, we all drove to movie in same car and convo took a weird turn see below The girl: We are getting a big tax refund Me: We always have to pay Hubby: I dont get why we always have to pay everyone gets big refunds Me: I own my own business and dont have any dependants, of course no refund. Hubby Well it sucks Me: Fine you want me to have a bunch of babies The girl : HAHAHA you cant have babies

I entered this contest http://www.everythinginvisible.com/ They are giving away 100 gift cards for pictures of the dirtiest windows. YAY So me being a big slob all I had to do was decide which filthy window in my house to take a picture of for submission. I chose this one, which I posted on my blog before. One because I already had the picture and two because Goober is all kinds of cute, I was hoping it would sway the judges. It worked I won Yay Goober and his piggy slobbery ways! Go enter everyone! It is an ongoing one every month.

My Aunt who I have mentioned before here , has 8 kids Growing up, I spent loads of time over at her home. Being an only child for 11 years, I found the chaos of her household fun and exciting. She had me staying for weeks at a time along with any neighborhood kid who happened to bop in. Her house was loud, messy, and down right hilarious. Now she has gobs of grand kids and great grand kids. Yet she found the time to make me this.   Sewn by hand For me! Yes I broke down crying Who knew? This self proclaimed hard case diva broad has a softer side. Shhh don't tell anyone internet