Thursday, July 30, 2009

Please Mr. Postman

My dear friend who lives across the pond had to pick up a package postage due today.
This in turned reminded me of my own funny anecdote about postage.
When yours truly was a young secretary at an insurance firm she had to mail out revised policies to all members annually
A tedious task to be sure but I did it diligently
A couple days later my boss called in said he would be late because he had to pick up something on way in.
Turns out it was his policy that I had MAILED two days before.
If that wasnt bad enough the thing had come postage due.
Which meant that ALL of them went out postage due.
What did yours truly say when confronted with these horrendous facts?
She said, Think of all the money I saved the company on postage.

I miss being young and cute and dumb

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Tuesdays Around Town

Another Tuesday and I managed to get pictures on time this week.
YAY me.
I normally post pictures of the lovely homes I find in towns but today I am posting something different
Here in my adopted town I call Mayberry they plant flowers all over the city.
They put them in pots
Hang em from street lamps
Wrap them around trees
Line their steps with them.
Not a weed in sight, nor a dull coloured pastel.
Blooming flowers EVERYWHERE.
Its amazing, beautiful and slightly disturbing in a way LOL
but anywh00000000..............without further delay here they are:

Potted and wrapped around a lamp.

More flowers pole dancing and if you look in the back ground you can see them all over the steps going to the court house.Climbing and claiming the steps of public buildings

Such pride in their landscaping, this is the front of the local libray.

I am almost ashamed of all the dandelions and weeds I grow in my own front yard!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Diva Day

What a great day today

We drove into the city in this.

We visited with our family.
We went swimming in one of these

We stopped for one of these on way home

Got back home all sunburned and my hair looked liked this.

What a great day

Thursday, July 23, 2009

There's an Ap for That

If you follow my blog at all you will know I live in a small town
It not really tiny but since I grew up in the city, I like to call it Mayberry.
Last night in the paper I read an article that said the local library was having a book sale.
We are there.
Mom and I clamber into the library and there are no books for sale.
It’s all the studious quiet you are used to hearing in a library along with a puzzled look by the woman at the front desk.

Me: Aren’t you having a book sale here?
Her: Oh no that is down at the Catholic Church.
Me: Oh I thought the library was having one.
Her: We are but it’s at the Catholic Church.
Me: Where is that?
Her: The big one, the big catholic church.
Me: Blink Blink....Ummm? I am not catholic.
Her: It’s on the main drag
Me: Main Street
Her: No down by the hospital
Me: Blink Blink

Guy interrupts looking at his Iphone says its blah blah street address.
Me: Oh thanks!

ME: Oh by the way what does it cost to get a library card?
Her: It depends on where you live, where are you from.
Me: Oh I live here in town have for years.
Her: Blink Blink

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Tuesdays Around Town

I know it's even Tuesday and I managed to get them up on time.
Yay me!

This first picture is not so much the house as it is their yard.
This is situated very close to a busy county road
Right in front of their house is a very active railroad track
Very busy one at that
I cant imagine the noise, but look at this lovely tree in their side yard.
This second one is located right across from the local schools if you can imagine
No parking, horrible congestion, loud kids 9 months out of the year, but look how lovely it is.

And finally this one is just down the block from a school
Very pedestrian, but look, its on a hill as if it should be set in some wild forest for gretal to stumble upon. The iron fence and the landscaping make it decidedly eerie, if it wasnt that colour blue, I think it would be considered the local haunted house. BEAUTIFUL

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Crack for an ADD Mind

Crack for the ADD Mind

Ok, it is no secret I have Adult ADD.
I usually delude myself that it is all under control until I get lost in a haze or a maze.
Examples below

Simple task make a playlist and listen to music whilst you work away content and happy
ADD nightmare: Pick one song and they say oh you might like this song.

Work is not getting done, stupid crazy play lists that I will never listen too, and hours of wasted time


Buy a book, yes I like this book
Often bought with………..this
I wonder why?
And this……….

Result broke and tons of stupid books on my kindle that I don’t remember buying nor will I ever read.

I got the roku box
So I can play movies INSTANTLY
Result……… might like this………
I have 116 instant movies on my stupid box and I haven’t watched one yet.

I hate love technology.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Tuesdays around Town

Yes again I know it is Wednesday
No reason to tell you again, that I am a procrastinator

Today's Tuesday is along one street.
These are fantatic homes but what is really amazing is they are along the same street with little
ranch houses nestled in between.
It is only three blocks from my own quaint modest street with my own crappy home on it.
I just think its amazing old neighborhoods with old homes and modern 1950 ranches all clustered together amonst the monster trees that no one will cut down

These were all taken from the street so forgive them for not being clear.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Mike Stewart

Martha Stewart I am not
But during my frumpy domestic phase the last couple months, I tried my hand at baking.
I made home made cinnamon rolls
I followed the recipe closely.
I did not flinch when I realized it would take 3 hours to complete and I started them at 9pm at night.
I plodded on.
I had already bought all the ingredients, except for vanilla, because everyone has a bottle of vanilla.
Does that crap even expire?
So after making the dough (1.5 hours), I figured out I didn’t have a rolling pin.
Did I ever own a rolling pin?
Probably not.
Chugging back the last of my six pack of Mike Hard Lemonade Lite (classy I know); I was ready to break out the hard stuff and call it a night.
But whoa Nelly, Martha Stewart I am not but clever I am.
That empty mikes bottle worked just fine thank you very much.
Feeling proud of myself, I went on to the other steps, popped them in the oven and proceeded to make the frosting.
I ransacked the kitchen looking for the old bottle of vanilla and finally found it in the back on its side CEMENTED to the shelf.
I am not kidding.
I need a ¼ teaspoon or this crap is going to fail.
I took a butter knife and banging it with my Mikes bottle, success.
The rolls were a complete success.
But I did wake up with a hangover; I am blaming it on the cinnamon

Saturday, July 11, 2009


Back in January, I quit my full time job of 13 years to concentrate on my at home business.
With so much more free time, I spent most of my time on, manicures, hair appointments, eyelash extensions and leisurely brunches and basic lazy days.

During one quick shopping trip I dropped by Wal-Mart to pick up a few things and I was surprised by it being a “different place”.
It was a lot of moms with their kids and retired people.
The pace was SLOW, no one was rushed and I felt totally out of place.
I was in full makeup in my faux fur jacket looking at laundry baskets.
But hey that’s me, no reason not to take care of you first!

Another time, I picked up mom in hot diva car to go shopping and despaired we were dressed alike.

But today, something happened.
I had on my not so dirty only wore them once Capri’s
My good t-shirt, by good I mean it is long and covers my big gut (no control tops for me!)
A banana clip in my hair
No manicure
No make up
Glasses on as contacts are a bother.

Me: Does my hair look alright in this clip
Her: Ummm
Me: Ok, it’s out. Better? (Wild hair stands up all over), do you have a comb?
Her: No
Me: Looking in vanity mirror, well shit.
Her: I know
Me: Wth (*&,#) when did this happen?
Her: I think it’s been coming on a while now.
Me: Well………………………sh*&t


Monday, we are going back to high maintenance.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Tuesdays Around Town

Today on Tuesdays around Town, we are not going far from home.
Pictured is my own old crappy house that I actually managed to get some flowers planted
We even got the flower beds cleaned up, weeded and threw some mulch in to cover the other flaws.
I know
Be kind dear internet.
Martha Stewart I am not
But I am quite proud of them.
I think they turned out pretty well
Plus I can actually cross it off my to do list.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Tag You're It

I worked all day yesterday
Then I did a couple hours this morning
I lie back down to get some sleep and couple hours later I hear a knock at door.
Goober is going bonkers, bouncing up and down and barking.
I open door, hair standing up all over, with a sleep filled head.
It’s a cop there.

Officer: I am afraid someone has put gang graffiti on your garage
ME: We've been tagged?
Officer: Afraid so mam, we have some suspects in mind
ME: Who is it? (Bloods, crypts, who, wth I live in Mayberry)
Officer: We think it’s a kid two streets over
ME: Erm ok so I’ll get the old man to paint it then
Officer: That might be best mam
ME: Erm ok
Officer Can I see your id card?
ME: Still in fog thinks wth where my business cards, oh wait I don’t have any
Scribbles name on index card and hands it to him
Officer: Looks confused
ME: I am out of business cards but that’s me, been here 20 years
Officer: Have a nice day mam
ME: You too

If we end up in the paper I will scan it and put it up for you
So cute
Small town living

Yes I know he meant ID card lol but like I said I was sleeping ;)

Sunday, July 5, 2009

The winner is


who wore a garage sale sticker to her church on her new dress
congrats and contact me with info for your prize

yay now you can buy a new dress

Get Your Hands Dirty

My Farm

I am addicted to farmville on facebook now
So silly
You can buy animals
and plant crops and harvest them
earn money for buildings and cool things like hay bales

Erm..... and no I havent gotten all my flowers planted yet in real life
But I did do some.
I will finish later
But isnt my virtual farm cute?

Friday, July 3, 2009


Something has happened to me today.
I have thrown off my lazy diva ways and have all sorts of plans for the weekend

Here is todays

Get dressed, put on make up, do hair, and even wear contacts!
Hit all the garage sales in town
Plant flowers in my flower beds ( a first in 3 years)
Make dinner and have company over
Work on line job for 3 hours tonight.

What do you think?
Can this former work-aholic transformed into a sluggish stay at home mom
pull it off?

Updates to follow

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