Tuesday, July 27, 2010

That's not my Name

First off, I love this song
I know it is too young for me really but it is quite catchy

I am terrible with using names
So everyone I know has a nickname
Gamma =mom
Geeb(hard G)=daughter
Goob=goober the dog
FRIEND(always in caps)=my friend
What about you dear internet
You have any weird nicknames for your friends and family

Friday, July 23, 2010

Slow Down

(I call this pic, Not our IceCream guy)

Remember those hot summer lazy days of your childhood?
The ice cream truck?
I love the icecream truck
But ours....
I know we dont have any kids on my street anymore
We are all old slow asses
But this guy
He flies down our street
Probably to get to the trailer court where the real money is
Which is fine
I am a capatalist
I understand speeding down the street to get to a destination
I mean I have a sports car I get it.
Physics says your tires will squeal if you turn when you are going that fast
I get that too
If you are going to go flying down my street with no thought of stopping
Could you shut your music off?
That's all I am saying

Monday, July 19, 2010

Fortunate Find

Mom may not always be able to find her
Tax papers
Parked car
But she did find the itty bitty crown that broke off my front tooth that cost 1000.00 to replace.
and this is todays fortune just weird

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Final Answer

I had a phone call today and normally I dont answer any calls I dont recognize on the caller id but this one said Gallup Poll Organization.
I can be one of those people when they say recent Gallup polls indicate .....
Some of the questions though, I dont know.
Is it good if the poll taker trying to sound all professional keeps busting out laughing?
Here are a few questions that got her giggling and I thought my answers quite proper and professional.

Did you eat 5 servings of fruits and vegatables yesterday
Erm No
But I ate at least 5 times.

On a Scale of 1 to 10 economy wise how would you rate your life now
Where do you expect it to be in 5 years
A 10, I am an optimist obviously.

Would you say you are satisfied or dissastified with the job the president is doing
Erm are those my only two choices
Erm.....Well it;s like moving in a demolished house and trying to remodel I suppose.
No one likes the porta potty but you have to put up with it awhile.
Does that mean you are satisfied?

What is your height and weight?
Your height and weight?
I am 5'8"
And your weight?
You need my weight?
**gives weight in the form of it's such and such time here* like its 1:30 get it? and no its not 1:30 here dear internet but I am not that honest

Did you exercise last week?
Believe it or not I did

Do you like your town city where you live?
Yes I love it.
Do you feel safe walking the streets at night?
Well I dont walk the streets at night but I would feel safe if i had too.
Once I had to walk downtown to get hubby out of bar but I felt safe.
I was pretty mad at the time though.
He probably didn't feel that safe when I found him.

Are there fresh vegetables and fruits easily available in your town?
 Yes there is a Farmers market every week
Not that I have ever been.
I could though, but it closes like at 11 am and heck I am not even up by that time some days.
Hmm Does that make it not easy for lazy fat people?
No I am going to stick with original answer.
Yes Final answer.

Any way that is just a small sample
 I wonder what demographic I will fall under?
Head up their arse type?

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Just call me Amy Winehouse

I lost my crown
Wahhhhhh I cant find it, help me Mom!
Dont worry I am on my way
We will find it
Wahhh no it's gone
Ok lets look here
Wahhhh I cant find it either
It cost 1000 dollars
Hey wait,Hubby is home early
Yay I am home early from work
WAHHHH in unison
I lost my crown
Mom cant find it either
I will find it
Dont worry
Wahhh you cant find it either

Well.......$hit dear internet
It's gone
Now I look like a hillbilly
Glad I posted my picture of me before I lost my front tooth

Friday, July 9, 2010

Wild Kingdom

Mom comes over to clean and says there is a dead bird on porch
Stupid Cat
The cat thinks she is a lion and likes to bring home dinner
Usually she leaves it on the porch
So I googled what to do and they said to put a bell on her collar
So I did
Then we went out in kitchen
There is a beheaded rabbit on the counter
Baby bunny to be exact she not a very big cat
After screams and squeals I throw a bag over it pick it up to toss it and
The leg is detached
Yes this is what I do when I have to pick up something disgusting
Or clean out the cat box
Or change a diaper
Even with my own kid if it was a disgustingly bad one the convo went like this:
Aww mommys little geeby goo made a poopoo
Runs to toilet
Stay there mommy be right back!!
Dont even get me started on what happened when the kid threw up
Lets just say by the time she was 7 she was either making it to toilet or cleaning it up herself because Mom was too busy in bathroom hurling herself
What a great mom!
Anywho any ideas how to tame this wild thing in my cat
The bell isnt working and she is already declawed
I dont have the stomach for wild kingdom

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Get out of my Room

I gave Goober a bath
He is all sweet smelling
I thought I would clean out his pen/beddie byes.
Things found in Goobers Hidy hole
-Remote control
_Tuna can
-3 squeakies ripped out of toys
-Cough drops
-A fork

And you thought you were a hoarder

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Who are you ?

I have gotten a few inquiries
Basically it boils down to Who the H#$ll are you ?
Here I am

Now you know ;)

Friday, July 2, 2010

Yay I am Back

My name is Tammy
and I  am addicted to my Iphone
I have been without it for over a week, two weeks, FOREVER
and all I can say is
I had no idea how much I used it
I was constantly reaching for my nonexistent phone to
-Check facebook
-Read email
-Play words with friends
-Look up random actors on imbd
-Shazam songs i heard on radio/tv
-Map garage sales
-Play music in my car via radio transmitter
-Check bank balances
-Take pictures of Goober
-Take pictures of Goober and the cat
-Look at lol cats
-Read books on Kindle
Oh yah and sometimes I call someone
So now you all know and thank goodness I found a good used one on ebay
I am back baby
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