Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Snip Snip Goober

You all remember Goober
and this post here

Last year this little dog would spend hours
digging her way under our fence
We ran her off numerous times but were not worried
After all she is so tiny and Goober is so big

So now we have this visiting us
Does he want to meet his daddy?
Snip Snip Goober
Thats all i am saying

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Just Eat it Already

I am home now and once in a while I get this weird domestic bug up my arse and bake
Hubby says he likes carrot cake
So I make a carrot cake cream cheese frosting
Man eats one piece says it good
3 days later I throw rest away
I like it with coconut frosting he says
Um ok weird but fine
Next time bug hits I make a carrot cake with white coconut frosting
Hubby eats one piece
Three days later throw rest away
I like the brown clear type coconut frosting he says
Wtf says I, are you talking abut German chocolate cake?
Yes that is it
That’s the kind of cake I like
So I buy the crap too make the stupid cake
Eat half the can of the chocolate frosting for the sides
Put coconut brown crap on top
Mix rest of that in with the last half chocolate frosting for sides
The stupid thing is huge two layers
He better eat more than one piece
That’s all I am saying
It looks retarded anyway, Rachel Ray would cry at the site.
I figure if he doesnt eat it I can just stick a fork in his head and be done with it :)

Monday, March 16, 2009

Tough Times for Tough People

The economy being what it is, I would hate to think I wasn’t doing my part to spend sensibly and have made drastic cut backs!

New rules for the household

No more eyelash extensions
Gamble at casino only 4 times a year not every month
Nails every other week rather then once a week
Limit adult pay per view rentals to 1 a week (pick wisely!)
No iTunes at all! Evil addictive iTunes
Buy brand cigs online
Tan 1 time less per week
Peel potatoes rather then buying instant (this is really doing my nails in by the way!)
Eat out only on weekends (again pick wisely)
Buy candy only in bulk (I can’t see this helping as much as I had hoped)
Buy one ply

See how frugal I am?
I am making these drastic changes in drastic times
So very proud but geez I hope it doesn’t last long.

PS Yes I am exaggerating (sort of), but I do miss those fun filled cash is no object days

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

You Can Yell at Me

Since leaving cube-ville (h3ll?), the quest has been for the perfect phone.
I knew they would call me in desperation, want, need, omg what we do without you please!
I wanted to be set up to ignore them properly.

I have a land line but it’s this dumb wireless phone.
The phone would ring but it would never be on its cradle.
It would be under a cushion, under the sofa, in the bathroom that was if the stupid thing was even charged.

In frustration I bought an old fashioned corded phone tethered forever to the wall
Argh but no caller ID
No worries I hooked up the old answering machine
Argh they all hang up
No worries I will star 69 the sneaky callers
Argh it cost like 75 cents or something and if you do that every day a couple times, it can add up.
No worries I will buy a cheap tethered wall phone with caller id on the handset.
Argh you have to pick the stupid thing up for the caller id to register, and you have essentially just answered it.
No Worries I will look real quick and hang up.
Argh I don’t think that is going over well with everyone

So finally!
I found this phone
It’s huge
The numbers are humongous.
But best of all, the thing yells the number out at you in this creepy computer voice.
I don’t even have to stop what I am doing now (get up off my fat arse to ignore callers)

Now if someone I didn’t want to talk to would just call me ;)

P.S. Yes I know it is meant for older people who cant get around and have hearing/seeing impairments, but its great for mean people like me too!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

If Rolled into One I Would Hate Her.

Women love SITC because above all else they are all different and they are all friends. Yes the clothes are great, the men are lush, but the underlying theme is they are all great women and great together.

Which leads me to todays post:

The women in my life.

I don’t normally get along well with women but there are a few in my life that I adore
Some related, some friends ,some only coworkers and acquaintances
They all have different qualities I find adorable and endearing

If you read this and are trying to find yourself, you each get two.

She works so hard all the time I admire it so much
She is so cute and so mean at the same time it makes me laugh

She is so optimistic to the point of doing stupid things
She has the greatest laugh in the world when she is not faking it

If I haven’t done, said, or thought it already she probably has
We both have same mood swings and recognize them (respect) quickly

She has been to hell and back and is still trying to cope
She has listened to my unsolicited hard advice with an open mind and she still likes me

She has always been there for me
She makes me laugh all the time

She is so smart, (smarter than I am) and that is so rare and uplifting (I know conceited right?)
She is just too dang cute, sweet, and wholesome its ridiculous. if I didn’t like her so much it would make me puke

She is so freaking organized it’s almost ocd-ish but can laugh at herself
She has ventured out to live on her own in big cities which I find that amazing and terrifying and could not do it myself.

She is gorgeous, single, smart and very business savvy and I am so jealous.
She always looks for the best in people

Isn’t this a great group of women?

I would hate to think what they say about me but hey at least they put up with me and I get to be surrounded by them. It took a long time assemble this group and I wish you dear internet, the luck to find the same.

Do you see you? Leave a comment tell me about the women in your life if you are bored.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Broke Stupid and Tired


I was broke a couple weeks ago.
This happens more often than not every few months or so and is normally not a big crisis.
Me being so clever with no sentimental feelings holding me back whatsoever, list my possessions I am bored with on eBay

Since liquid cash is the goal at the moment I ruthlessly undercut all current auctions and sale them all quickly with buy it now.


I forgot I did all my shipping from my former job
My former job that had lovely boxes galore, a ups shipping center and packing material of various sorts and sizes , all at my disposal
I also had a running tab on shipping fees and it was all priced at cost.
Being the spontaneous sort I am (stupid), I had quit my long term job with no notice last month.
I don’t think they will allow me the luxury of that shipping area any more


I am exhausted.
I have run around for last week on a scavenge hunt for boxes and packing tape and cheaper shipping solutions.
Lugging items and boxes into commercial places and trying not to scream when they quoted outlandish prices.
I do chuckle at the thought of what my buyers think when they open their lovely purchases.

Things I used for packing material

Old torn t-shirts
Empty beer cartons
Mismatched socks
Torn up magazines
Shredded junk mail
Plastic Wal-Mart bags
Dry cleaning bags
Empty soda bottles
Others I wont list here

I don’t know if this means I am going to start hoarding packing material and boxes from now on or watch my budget better so I don’t need cash
Want to take bets? ;)

Monday, March 2, 2009


It's here

My Kindle!

I thought the iphone was great but this thing......

Every ADHD persons dream!

I would like to read that book.

I wish I could surf the net wirelessly away from home.

I wonder if that books is any good? I should download a preview.

I can barely see this font, I wish it was bigger.

I use to have that book. I wish I still did. I would read it again.

Yes, I know all you artsy fartsy types like to smell your old moldy books and dream of when you first read it.
I get how you fell in love with it and how the look of the worn and torn yellow pages makes you all weepy and sad for your lost youth.
Its great how much you adore the dusty old book stores with the old creepy furniture and over varnished shelfs.
I know how much you enjoyed purusing for hours to find some first edition kid book that is probably on sell on ebay for 8 dollars.
I get it. I really do.

I'd listen to you go on and on about it and I will even nod now and then, but please dont be offended if I dont listen long.
I want to read my newest cheapo purchases on my brand new Kindle.

P.S. Feel free to comment with your favourite book recommendations and I can you know, buy it, NOW!

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